Tuesday, April 11, 2006

Yes, No, or Wait

The ALPHA Course that I took last fall taught me a lot of things about Christianity. One of those is about prayer. Nicky Gumbel said that, contrary to popular beliefs, God actually answers our prayers.

He may answer them with any of the following:
  1. Yes
  2. No
  3. Wait

A "No" or a "Wait" is, logically, a valid answer. It's just that we want to hear "Yes" all the time.

Well, I had a hemithyroidectomy more than two weeks ago. The left half of my thyroid gland was removed because the doctor couldn't tell what exact abnormality he found in the needle biopsy. When he told me of the results of the fine-needle biopsy, he explained that the left half of my thyroid gland would be examined to see if it was a benign growth, a benign cancer, or a malignous cancer. Of course, best-case scenario is it's a benign growth, which means that I'd be fine after the hemithyroidectomy. Worst-case scenario is it's cancer; according to the otolaryngology specialist, thyroid cancer isn't life-threatening, which means that the other half of my thyroid gland would have to be removed through surgery and that I would have to take thyroid hormone replacement pills, calcium replacement pills, and vitamin D replacement pills for the rest of my life.

Since I talked to Dr. Maharaj (the otolaryngology specialist) about that, I had been praying for God's will in my life. While waiting for the bus to take me to the SkyTrain station, I said this aloud: "Your will, not mine." And I believe - I still do - that God let my thyroid gland grow for a reason. That reason is still not apparent in my life, but I know that there is one.

Anyone should expect, though, that I'd prefer the best-case scenario: that it is only a benign growth. I had been praying that I could accept God's plans for me, even if it meant that I would have thyroid or throat cancer. But deep inside my heart, I didn't want it to be cancer.

Seventeen days after the hemithyroidectomy, my prayers were answered in my favour. It's only a benign growth!

God is so amazing. He gave me the inner peace that I wanted and needed regarding my health. Everyday since the surgery, He reminded me that He is the pilot of my life; I'm only a co-pilot. Above all, He loves me and that He lets all things happen for my own good, even if I have to wait a long time for my prayers to have a "Yes" answer.

Thank You Father.

Also, I want to thank everybody who prayed - and are still praying - for me. My family. My true friends. My co-workers. Everybody who cared - and cares - enough to keep me in their thoughts and prayers.

"He alone is my rock and my salvation; he is my fortress, I will never be shaken." - Psalm 62:2

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