Saturday, January 1, 2005

Happy new year?

First of all, happy new year to you - whoever you are.

For me, 2004 ended with a disappointing thud. Things have been very crappy lately in many (if not all) aspects of my life. Academically, I had to take two courses to complete my requirements, so I can get my diploma. As I said in my latest short story, damn Canadian income taxation! [Excuse my French, by the way.] Spiritually, my growth has been stunted by the things that keep me busy (e.g. school, work). Professionally - well, not exactly - I hate my current job! I can't wait to get a new job. Financially, my student loan repayments will keep me from spending on stuff that I like (e.g. CDs, fiction, shoes, chocolates), actually even on things that I need (e.g. new clothes, PC stuff). Romantically - if such word to describe love life exists - I'm still single. While most of my girl friends and guy friends have dated at least one person - like my best friend - I remain boyfriendless. I'm not complaining all the time, actually. It's just that I learned that my best friend "got herself" a boyfriend recently. There's also a certain guy I've been thinking about lately in the most peculiar way (to quote a Mariah Carey song). Not to mention that my brother asked me if I have a boyfriend earlier last night (as in, early evening of December 31st). Those things triggered me to ask when my time will come. It will pass, I know. But since it hasn't, I will drive myself insane associating the boyfriend question to the guy that I was talking about while listening to Kelly Clarkson, Mariah Carey, Whitney Houston, JC Chasez, etc., writing fiction, or watching films on DVD.

I wonder if 2005 will be a better year. Hopefully better than 2003, which was a very eventful year? Hopefully much better than 2004, which brought major changes in my life, most of which I wouldn't even think about if I had my way?

New year's resolutions? Nah. When I can think about chocolates without wanting to eat it, I would be ready to make new year's resolutions and keep them.

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